The friendzone can be a very annoying zone, especially if your feelings are guinea. We have two types of chemistry when it has to do with the act of seduction.
There are sexual (or physical) and emotional chemistry. Your ability to combine the two chemistry types in their right proportion will deny you the friend zone card.
The sexual attraction shouldn’t be over used before you will send a signal of ‘I need sex from you’ which might not necessarily be your intentions towards the one you love.
The same applies to the emotional chemistry, when over used, you will only end up with the platonic BFF card because; you will earn his/her trust in a manner that they feel so comfortable confiding in you with their deepest secrets. You need to be acting like a lover not as a friend, or risk the LJBF (let’s just be friends) speech. In most cases, you probably sent out wrong signals in your bid to appear nice and super understanding.
You need to know that the attraction in men and women are opposite. When as a man you build your emotional intimacy with a woman without coming open with your intentions towards her, chances that you will remain a platonic friend and confidant to her is 80%. She will definitely ditch you when that new guy shows up. I bet she will be doing much more romantic things with him because he opened up on time.
However, this is not same scenario when it has to do with men because; a man can still achieve his romantic needs with his platonic female friend and both will remain BFF (Side note: I don’t know if this happens in platonic queer relationships).
Well, in the case of you being friend zoned for the third time in two weeks simply mean you are repeatedly making a particular mistake. This is the reason why you need to examine what exactly is your attraction with these women/men and your pattern of chase. If you are repeating a pattern, then it is a clear problem of your mindset and not with the women/men in particular.
Secondly, you need to stop investing so easily and maintain some level of boundaries with him/her. Women looking for emotional intimacy pacifiers tend to get close and build deep connection when given the room. This will make the relationship one-sided because; you will be an easy tool for her to use and achieve her needs while your own needs will be starring at you.
As funny as it may sound, you will find yourself feeling amazing that she trusts and confides in you. And your deceiving instincts will always tell you that she will definitely reciprocate the feelings you have for her because you listen and comforts her…white lie. She is about to friend zone you soon. If he/she is always unloading to you than they are listening when you talk can be a clear warning sign that you are about to be ditched.
You need to maintain certain level of space limits. You don’t need to always appear at their beck and call. Set some boundaries and be in charge too, it doesn’t have to be them always. You don’t want to pursue him/her so aggressively that they start feeling overwhelmed by your attention. However, work towards passing the message of ‘I need you to be more than a friend’ to him/her. Remember that the key to staying out of friend zone is making your intentions clear, says relationship expert Tracy Thomas, Ph.D.
Be it platonic or romantic relationship, it has to be reciprocal. Don’t settle for less than what you actually deserve in a relationship. When you are the only one participating in the act of making things work, it becomes one-sided and same time; void of respect. Accepting rejection will be a far better option in such case scenario. Don’t be afraid of rejection, it is better for you to move on to someone that will accept and reciprocate your feelings than to stick with another that sees you as a buddy; leaving you in the friend zone feeling miserable and pathetic.
Thanks for stopping by to read this, I will love to listen to your opinions and questions on this via your comments below, remember! We always look out for each other at www.mysugarcandy.com Stay cool!