side-chick

Signs you are only but his side-chick

Ladies, listen up.

Some species of men claim to be very smart with women by having girlfriends who think they are ‘main chicks’ while they are actually side-chicks with a big label. This is the reason you have to be extra smart to catch the culprit before they add you to their side-chick victims.

It is always a thing of joy to know that you are the only woman that your man professes love to. But with today’s fast-paced world, such is becoming a challenging task for women. The level of playing around with women by some bad exampled men is on the increase. There is possibility of you hooking up with a guy who has a serious date but wants to keep as his side-chick.

As a woman, you need to play with caution especially when that your new man changes his status to ‘in a relationship’. How sure are you that you are the only one he is referring to with such status? You seriously need to become wiser.

If you are much into the relationship than he is or his behavior is a little bit weird to you, then it’s time to change the game to suit you both.

I can remember meeting a guy who claimed he was coming to see my parents by the end of the year for marriage talks. We talked often on the phone like 3-4 times daily, but he never asked me to come see him or was eager to come either as our locations were far apart. It wasn’t a good sign for me. Guess what I did! Since the distance was already there, I had to get close to his friend that equally had an eye on me just to get information about my new man from him. Lo and behold it worked perfectly as planned, my suspicions were right. He had a main-chick that he was planning to settle down with. After such revelation from his friend, I had to let it go and still told him I found out his plans for me. I didn’t wait for him to surprise me with his wedding invitation card, I had to surprise him first as a smart Lady.

To avoid a situation like this, note the following signs:

Hiding of cell phones coupled with unanswered calls

If he is in the habit of keeping his phone out of reach whenever you are together and always carrying it like an egg about to break, you have to observe him more my dear.  Don’t get me wrong here; I am not saying you should be struggling his phone with him, but he should be relaxed around you as your man.

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If he ignores a particular number that calls often when you both are together and prefers to put his phone on the silent mode to prevent you from knowing when it rings, then takes an unnecessary excuse to shift to another room to make some calls, you should know that something is amiss. Another trick is not saving some numbers and password protecting his phones. As a lady, you need to be vigilant so you won’t be overtaken by events.

He prefers meeting you in your place not his place

He is staying alone and hardly invites you to his place but shows up without notice very often in your place, and you are gushing and shouting ‘he’s romantic’. Please don’t conclude yet my lady.

Why don’t you try suggesting a change of game plan by you visiting his place as often as he does, and hear what he has to say! If he gives you stupid excuses on why he prefers your place, then you have to watch him before he gives you the heartbreaking news of you being his side-chick.

He has never introduced you to any of his friends, family and co-workers

If you both just started dating, there’s every possibility of lack of opportunity to meet a family member. But that of his friends and colleagues is not negotiable. When a man is proud to have you as his woman, he is eager to display you to meet his friends. Some men take their time before introducing their woman to their family; they probably do when they are ready to settle down with you.

However, if the relationship has lingered for a while and he has not introduced you to his family, then you have to watch it. Men are unpredictable these days, so you have to step up and follow up with their games.

I wonder why a woman would introduce her man to her own family when she has not met his. That shows desperation and men love fooling such ladies by telling them what they want to hear. Be smart!

He has feminine hygiene products in his house and car that doesn’t belong to you as his woman

If you constantly find stuffs like; earrings, female fashion magazines, female foot-wears and leftover make-up items, then he might not just be your man alone; you might be sharing him with many. This should peak your interest more if he is not staying with a female relative. You have to watch this red flag seriously; don’t overlook it.

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He suddenly uses the formal tone on you whenever he is home

If he constantly talks to you with the formal tone without even addressing you with your name or pet name whenever he is home, it can only mean that the main chick is home and he can’t be free with you over the phone to avoid problems. In most cases, he tends to hang up on you as often as possible, probably to avoid questions from his main chick.

He avoids every photo opportunity

As a smart man, he would dodge every picture opportunity with you before you will upload it on the social media platforms and it lands him into trouble with his main chick or other important side chicks. If you observe his picture dodging skills, you need to watch him on that.

He acts disconnected whenever you get emotional with him

At a point in a relationship, a woman get to fall for her man to the extent she opens up her feelings and telling him about them. But if he placed you in the side chick cadre, he will always act disconnected whenever you are open about your feelings towards him because he wouldn’t want you to nurse such for the relationship. His mind and emotional ecstasies is with his main chick not you. His heart lies somewhere else.

Men have gotten a lot more clever and underhanded in their tactics that is why you need to step up your game as a woman too, although being a side chick is no longer an embarrassment to some women, which gives men more reason to have one.

You need to know your worth as a woman; don’t appear too desperate to have a man that doesn’t deserve you. Be careful and smart so you don’t fall a victim of “use and dump”.

Thanks for your time; I will love to listen to your opinions and questions on this via your comments below. Remember, we always look out for each other at www.mysugarcandy.com. Stay cool!

 

 

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Author, blogger and a relationship coach that will help you remove all your emotional blocks and maintain healthy; happy and intimate dating/relationship life.

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